This post goes to Phillip and Yvonne Brinkman.
Cheers to you two for you battle with the good old boys of the Keweenaw County Road Commission.
Congratulations on winning that frivolous suit brought on by the land company puppets that hold office here.
FIGHT<FIGHT<FIGHT< till the end. Now lets turn the tables and start taking up issues with the good old boys and the good old boy network.
I see all their campaign signs in the county. nailed to trees. Tell ya what when it comes to road commission members , NONE< thats right nada will be getting any vote from me.
I am with Paul lets roust all of them.

HEAR HEAR!
YOU GOT THAT RIGHT DEAR!
LMT

"While the short happy crew"

While the short happy crew
Is boiling another stew
On their beachhead the Bete Gris shore
Our heroes without luck
Now without jobs with only their pluck
Begin another trek 'cause they're poor

Further ahead a bonfire begins raging
With orange sparks floating up with the wind
Seems a different crowd has now gathered
To hear a recent immigrant implore:

Yes we'll build all along the rough shore
By the buildings already on the shore
We'll claim to love the ecology
If we do harm there'll be no apology
If that nut says our septics we ignore
We'll say it's really rather minor
Besides our forefathers were copper miners!
And we'll claim lofty values galore
We'll sign papers we'll take pictures
All along the aged timeless seashore
All along the ceaseless seashore.
For we know what's best
On our individual conquest
Of the ceaseless and timeless seashore
The shoreline that we say we adore.
Yes our homes will be a chain of the shore
We're a permitted use on the seashore
Yes our homes will be a dam between the shore
And a floodgate of development for-shore
So there's no need for worries
We'll roast hot dogs we'll brave flurries
And we will all gather about
To stomp scream and shout
If a business tries to come in the door
If a business tries to come in the door
We'll run off the loggers,
We'll post signs we'll post watchers
While we look for those artifacts in the sand
We'll post watchers while we dig in the sand
We'll thank the visitors most kindly
To love the area and leave it behind
And if their kids leave their ghetto
Maybe they'll return to our high plateau
Once they've made their million bucks
And they've seen the great world we began
With what we know is no longer a democratic plan

And while the speaker has been speaking
The crowd has been clapping
And shouting and whistling encore
Calling and nodding for more

So our heroes sidle up to the pack
Begin clapping and quacking like ducks
When the speaker announces another man named Mac
Whose septic plans the Health Department said would efflux
A stream of human waste to the pretty blue lake
So his plans he was made to remake

And with that Mac threw a log on the fire
And said his neighbors were doing just fine
Even though it began to transpire
Their ground could not possibly retire
The things that pooh-pooh would require

Whereupon another man argumentative
Claims he knows well a state representative
Who will surely assist
In a meeting betwixt
Mac and The Health Department for more
Single dwellings on the ageless seashore.
With "keep out" signs like before.

Ray Don Gass pokes Walt in the ribs
And nods to Roy to look o'er yonder at the squibs
Walking along on a trek of their own
Singing a song that's very well known:

"It's the hard knock life, for us!
No one cares for you a smidge!
Unless you own a lakeside cottage!
It's the hard knock life, for us!"

But that Walloping crew was like a bone that had been chewed
Thrown away and quickly forgotten
For it was obvious to see
What the bonfire crew couldn't see
Men who had wives and sons and daughters!
And before the Walloping crew passed out of sight
Our three heroes waved and pointed with all their might
To try to get the crowd to acknowledge 'em!
But like that passing crew
As our heroes soon knew
They were Invisible,
Their lives to others did not matter.
And as the Singing Sands bore
Their treads from that shore
The crowd behind them remained
Making plans but disregarding the water.

Alone on the road
Walking south they made their way
The night soon quiet around them
But at the very next turn
They dove for the brush
As headlights came before and behind them

The speeding vehicles almost smasked
Head on in a crash
But they swerved at the last minute to avoid it
And lying behind on the shoulder we find
The words "Yes" and "No" side by side

From the bushes they now come
Their faces rather glum
As they try to leave all of this behind them

'Ay mon! 'Ave you Americans no common sense? We Jamaicans love our winter vacations from the tropical heat. We are the mirror image of you Yankees who flock down to Kingston in February in search of ganga and calypso. Plus we flirt with snow bunnies make a •••• good profit for our trouble. Can you say the same?
DAY-O, DAY-AY-AY-O!

Angus - Yes, it is the same Fred, a man I've known and loved for many years, an honest, caring man totally dedicated to Keweenaw County. It would seem that from this point forward he must abstain from any vote on the ski-hill issues or open himself to a real and serious question of conflict of interest.

Thanks for the chuckle, Cheap Trickster!

All you flat-landers remember, the hills have eyes!

Hey Man,
You're offended by what? You didn't say.

What kind of prejudiced world do I live in? Well, I assume I am living in the same world you live in.

And there's no reply at all
There's no reply at all

walt, I am offended! I am Jamaican and live in the Keweenaw. What kind of prejudiced world do you live in?

to all:
Vote Yes for development period. who else has been willing to pump $5 million into keweenaw county in the recent past? get with it, the old mining days are long gone.

Walt:
Very good my dear lad. The lone ranger also counted on tonto to come to the rescue. What about communist pinkos? As your Keweenaw Realist refers to environmentalists. OR does the shoe only fit when it is convenient to all Ya Copper Harbor Folks?

On the sewage operator:

Well, all I can say is this: We have learned that the Keweenaw has only room for one kayak adventure company. Crosswinds can't offer the same because one already exists in Copper Harbor.

And secondly: I'll repeat that tired argument--Crosswinds won't be hiring any locals--they'll be hiring Jamaicans.

Funny, isn't it, that Paul was censored for something said about our colorful past with the Native Americans...but apparently it is okay to trod on the Jamaicans?

So what the •••• is it? Out of 2,000 people, Crosswinds found one local qualified to operate a system? Or are you mad because this is another person who apparently cares enough about what happens that he becomes involved in local government?

Whatever it is, why don't you start getting your hands dirty, with something other than throwing mud.

The last time I heard money being offered on-line, it was in terms of bail money for those who vandalized the surveyor's work on the mountain.

I guess they're in need of $4 at Keweenaw Today.

How's about this money be put to good use?

Ah, but who cast the deciding vote?

W2
I believe you're right. Calumet would have been our state capital but for one vote.

Am I wrong, or could Calumet have been our state capital if another one vote had been cast differently?

Scene 1, Act 1
The scene opens with our hero in his white dodge pickup approaching the poopy ponds in Lac La Belle. (AC/DC, Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap, plays in the back ground). The letters YSI are barely visible on the white stallion. As our hero pulls up to two African American Heritage students he bellows? "So how is the spray today?", As the camera pans west, we see the Multi colored rainbow coming off the spray of poop in the evening sun, colors of yellow, brown, black, make for a surrealistic rainbow like something out of an Alfred Hitchcock thriller. Trees with moss like something out of Southern Comfort are in the background. New species of birds and other animals frolic in the mist, coats shiny like wet minks glisten in the sunlight. The students step forward and begin to tell of the visitor that day. Seems the Grand Master and his broken down old glory football player stopped by to grace their presence. We are so grateful oh grand master for the privilege to be poop operators. Our hero acknowledges the greatness of the Grand Master and nods, the white stallion roars, as he leaves the poopy ponds to check on other workers.
Scene ends with the workers admiring the multi-colored rainbow, unlike any ever seen before.

ART:
Paid for by the Committee for a Better Keweenaw Economy.
LONNNIE GLIEBERMAN:Treasurer.HEHEHEHEHEHEHE

VOTE NO: To Irresponsible Development.

Question for anyone?
I went to Chuck Bucks, Keweenaw Liberty Library and read the latest sewer application for Black Bear.
Now under the application
Page, 1,2,3, Site map
#6 it names Fred Longpre, YSI, HC1 Box 29, Mohawk as the Operator of the system.

My questions are, is this the same Fred on the Zoning Board that Voted YES?
Is this the same Fred that Works at YSI?
Just wondering if it is or not?
Rich what kind of wage does sewer operator pay?

ART:
Sorry I dont buy the wind. Metal, frames, sings gone. Some signs obviously ran over. Just because you believe Breakwinds BS. Dont think you can pass it on to us. Again, no wind just picked these signs out of the ground and blew them away. Maybe hurricane force winds will but not what we had today. If it was the wind then where are the signs? Secondly does wind leave tire tracks?

Tsk Tsk,

This message was moved from RESPONSIBLE OPINIONS for lack of identification. You are welcome to post messages on this page if you are not willing or able to take personal responsiblity for your opinions.

REWARD:
Anyone with information leading to the arrest and conviction of those responsible for the sign damage last night in Keweenaw. Post with e-mail address and the $200.00 is yours.

Well well, seems like the YES people cannot stand a fair fight. With all the signs urging voters to vote NO. Pulled, ran over etc. last night in the Keweenaw it may be time for us to wonder why would they want to stifle our voice? ANYONE with information that will lead to the arrest of these individuals that did this undemocratic vandalism will be given a $200.00 reward. Just post me in the right direction and that dough will be yours.

By Cousin Jack on Friday, October 27, 2000 - 12:48 am:

BOO!

GOTCHA!

A proposal Inn keeping with the tradition of dancing Spoons and Forks, a la Looney Tunes and Merry Melodies, has been received by the informal surf-board of control.
The board has given me license to present the proposal here in brief. An American corporation, tired of using Chinese peasant labor, has decided to relocate to the Keweenaw, where they will be closer to the demand of their wares. They are proposing to begin manufacture of an item that marketing and analysis suggests will be a hoot.

The hoot: A Talking Large-Mouthed Caw-Caw
Basically, it is a small cottage with a string attached. When the string is pulled, a sash is thrown open and a bug-eyed sleeper in nightcap pops out and
begins to cluck, a variation on the cuckoo-clock theme.

Without giving away all of their plans, here are a few of the talking large-mouthed caw-caw sayings:

"All around the County line!
I say let's all define the times!
Cause I am the one to know best!
I am a great big gabby caw-caw!"

"People here have values from coast to coast,
I've been here longer so I can boast,
Don't worry. Drive sports cars.
In the sun,
or in the rain,
eat hard toast
from Kaleva Café
Don't worry. Drive sports cars."

"Well I warned you once!
I warned you twice!
But uh uh baby stay off of my coastline!
Now don't you go messing around with these bluewater pools."

The American corporation, Possibilities With Polymers (PWP, Inc)
Has indicated a keen desire to begin soon rehabilitating a local mine site where they hope to set up shop.
Rabba-a-dabbawabba, That's all Folks!

By Cousin Jack on Thursday, October 26, 2000 - 11:45 pm:

--First, a brief prologue. As you probably don't recall, when we last heard from Cousin Jack he was firmly part of the "Mendota Camp" and ready to wage guerrilla warfare on Da Bear. Since then, some interesting manifestations have evolved. And a change in his complexion from ruddy sunburn to crome yellow is barely half of it. In the interest of medical science, we have monitored his descent into feral primitivism at this former Coast Guard Station with a well-funded yet highly detached enthusiasm. Following an edited reprint of his last Mendota Post, we'll let Jack speak(and paint) for himself.
Sincerely yours,
Criminal Psychologist Dr. A. Leonard Huxley Wayne State Ph.D--

By Cousin Jack/MN on Thursday, June 22, 2000 - 02:44 pm:
Deer Friends:
As of now I am withdrawing from this forum to pursue other means of stopping this undemocratic and illegal intrusion by Black Bear Entertainment.
To BLACK BEAR: never ever provoke a Bull Moose(didn't your Momma teach you anything?)
HAVE A GREAT SUMMER EVERYONE!

(11:30 pm Eagle Harbor)
Yes...Eagle Harbor. Apparently I've been misled for months about even my very location. O these white-coated wardens may have been fiendishly clever, but I have something extra-special planned for them. It is now Day 126 of my personal hostage crisis. Held without bail in the sound-proofed lamproom of the Keweenaw County Historical Society(a publicly restricted area as everyone well knows).
I've deciphered by Torch Lake smoke signal that some cruise ship has run aground at Bete Gris causing local consternation. Now that's not my dilemma, nosiree Emma, so it's no business of mine whether it's the Nina, the Pinta or PT 109(though I await the uncertain fate of that hard luck crew and those heroes they find)!
The question for me now is this:
"How long will I be held here, a Prisoner of War?"( while my keepers lay low, just keeping the score).
If a Bull Moose I was, then a Bull Moose I am(and that's nothing to sneeze at, like thimbleberry jam). For you psychologists and veterinarians and Communist Pinkos, I've painted what follows(and had it copied at Kinko's).
Be scared, be very scared, so don't sleep in the hollows or you'll meet your fate in the canvas that follows:

(U.P. EYE) 11:55 am October 27, 2000 Christchurch, NZ
Just wanted the more democratically-minded of you to know that, even with a Sidney Olympics to prepare for, I tried to keep my eyes on the ever-bouncing Keweenaw ball.
A reprise from the K-Today archives:

By Nickadams on Friday, September 8, 2000 - 01:06 pm:
I just visited the on-line DMG and discovered a couple of interesting things. It was Mr. Elias who requested the administrative remedy of the ZBA defining "low intensity", preferring to avoid any unneccessary legal action. I find some wisdom and faith in this on Crosswinds part.
There was a letter to the editor that claims the County Prosecutor has stated that the residents of Ahmeek will not be allowed to vote on the November Mt. Bohemia referendum. If Ahmeek is in Keweenaw County, then I find this to be(sorry, Mr. Spock) "highly illogical".

Good Nuncle,
I went out to the graveyard and hunkered down next to the grave of my old English teacher and repeatedly yelled the word, ain't ain't ain't, blowing dried leaves and spent grass from her grave.
Gosh, you could almost feel the vibrations of her pirouetting down below there in her Sears Roebuck dress.
In fact, there was a general hum about the place, what with all them down below busy doing spins in their graves.
Wonder what the other fuss was about?
Some guy collecting flags saw me and ran me off.
The Naughty Nef-few

Yeah, but my grandpa split more firewood than your grandpa.

In fact, my grandpa was splitting firewood back when splitting firewood was cool.

(3:00 pm Bete Gris)
Don't believe those icky men in white coats from the Mendota "State Hospital". They will swear I was found huddling on the shore of Deer Lake last June, covered with black fly bites and dressed only in makeshift evergreen moose antlers which had been duct-taped to my recently shaven head.
This is a vicious outright lie! Who authorized them to rezone this "lighthouse" into a mental health holding facility, I ask you?
Nobody that's who!
Oh oh...here they come again up the spiral staircase, their muddy feet making another mess for me to clean up(Hey...just you try mopping iron-grate steps in ankle chains!)
Back beneath my by now well-loosened strait-jacket little Palm Pilot and rest comfortably upon my love-handle with well-deserved expectation...ssshhh now, more later when it's safe to type...
God Bless High Tech Smugglers!

Contrary to current political opinion hereabouts, neither the sun nor Keweenaw's future revolves around Mt.Bohemia and Proposal B.
It revolves around thee...
Vote on November 7th

Adjidamo,

Were your grandparents pinkos too? You communists invented propaganda! Stop pointing your fingers. And what's wrong with selling jam? You too good for that? And what's stupid about questioning what you sickos are trying to do?

I don't pretend to know it all..or anything for that matter, but just today I picked up the latest piece of propaganda from Crossbear. Have you seen it? Does it tell one piece of truth? It really is PROPAGANDA. This is a sad situation our county is going through. I love all those who figure they know it all, but ask stupid questions about county boundaries at this stage of the game, or those who purport to support themselves by selling jam on the side of the highway. Give me a break. My family was here a long time ago. Let me just say that my grandparents are turning in their graves at the audacity of folks who just don't get the picture.

It's a sad situation here in Keweenaw County, people.

Let's just take a minute to remember those who have died and gone before us. When is the last time YOU took time to visit your grandparents' graves? Maybe you have. I have compassion for you then. If you haven't recently, maybe you should. That visit, standing beside the graves of immigrants, tradespeople and miners always reminds me of my REAL VALUES. Where are our collective concerns? Do you think these folks came here to become rich?

Take time to take a walk past your ancestors' graves this fall. Make sure they're tended to. Take time to talk to them.

They are after all, the true repositories of wisdom.

I'm back, Ski-Bum. Correction, it's not HIS property, it is property LEASED from LSLC, with, according to the business plan draft, no payments due until the 3rd year, and then based in lift ticket sales. Sweet deal!

Ski Bumsky:
You mean to tell us that Lonnie boyga says one thing and does another. My,my doesnt that sound like the way in which this whole fiasco has been handled by Breakwinds since it began. In your words, "so he thought this must be something to agree to and ignore". That is go gliebermanish. I mean like gag me with a spoon dude.

Fly,

I guess I misjudged Lonnie badly. He won't let anyone tell him what to do with his property, of that I'm sure, so he must have thought this was just something to agree to and ignore. I hate it when people grovel before the communist sickos that way.

Hi Ski-Bum - At the last Mt. Bohemia Advisory Committee meeting Lonie passed out the official NSAA Environmental Charter update. On page 2 of 4 of the list of Ski Areas Endorsing Environmental Charter, Mount Bohemia is listed as one of four Mi. areas. Also be it said that many environmental groups don't feel the charter has much weight. I don't know, won't comment until I do, but food for thought.

Well I guess you can do whatever you want then, eh?

Under a full head of steam comes our Keweenaw Cruise Ship,
To the Keweenaw coastline,
To the Keweenaw Isle, where the poo poo smiles
And on Bohemia the battle still roars

While out on the deck the light-hearted crew
Are engaged in a tropical theme:
They're burying their heads in a booyah stew
Before crawling on all fours through wood chips and white goo.
All the way from the stem to the stern
All the way from the stem to the stern

Right up to the belly of a grinning Heikki Lunta
Who is reclining on the fantail throne
While all down the line the more seasoned are inclined
To smack the initiates with Finnish snow scoops
And Iverson snowshoes till they moan:

"We want to live there
We'll be snow-scoop engineers
For we're Copper Country bound
Where the jobs are said to abound!"

Nearby on the shore we now turn to find
Our heroes stumbling and running like blind.
They're waving and shouting all the way to the mouth,
That posted waterway o'er by Bete Gris South.
They're to lighten the Singing Sand Shore.

Ray Don quickly stops by the channel to be crossed
But he plunges right in
expecting water up o'er his chin
But he makes it across with no sign of exhaust
To knock upon the wooden lighthouse door.

"There's a vessel coming in!
But the channel she's heavy
With poo poo and detritus galore!"

And though he knocks and he knocks
And he screams and he shouts
Nay not a sound, not even time clocks
No nothing within to implore!

Yet through an open window
A voice placates the Keweenaw night air
A voice placating the cold night air:

(Within a man, spit-polishing a snowboard,
shiny skies readied in a corner.)
To develop, or not to develop, that is NOT the question.
To ski, or to snowboard, NOW, THAT! Is a question!
Yay, whether 'tis nobler to suffer the slinging mud
And Paul's outrageous comments
Or to create a new web site And by creation, rise above them.
Aye, there's the rub,
For with a thousand hits upon the web site,
What comments will come?
To CLUP, or not to CLUP,
'Tis a consummation devoutly to be wished
Aye, all these gosh darn questions
For how long can I bear the pangs of the law's delay?
Who cares if they grunt and sweat under a weary life,
That blasted Walt, utter fool
Complete moron, Crosswinds tool!
What's this?
A knocking, a rapping upon my chamber door!
Darkness and devils!
'Tis the heathen infidel, Ray Don Gass!
That infamous country and western singer!
Ingratitude, thou marble-hearted fiend!
Away with you! Be gone!

Further within,someone painting signs, with another voice,
Fie upon them! 'Tis the riff-raff!
And where be their rusty Fords and Chevrolets!
Our train are men of choice and rarest parts
Close the window, lest we become
Infected with their petty needs and basic wants!

Pray sir, be patient!
Hear my plea
We need the light! Kind, sir!
And notice I didn't pronounce it "cur"
Besides, I want to play me guitar
On yonder approaching vessel
The Walloping Window Blind!

The anguished face within,
Looks heavenward agin,
And says with a heavy sigh:
See, the Little Dogs and All
Ray, Roy, Walt, they bark at me.
(The lower sash quickly slams shut.)
But the Mendota Light begins to blink at the sea
And though the light makes its flashes in 15-second dashes
At thirty knots comes the Walloping Window Blind

With a shudder it soon crashes
Upon the Singing Sands of Bete Gris shore
And like a fat lazy lion
It begins a slow moaning roll to its side
While her crew is jumping off the fo'c'sle to unwind.

Our heroes faces are most horrid
Ray Don Gass slaps his forehead
And Roy G Biv howls at the moon
Walt's all in a tizzy, he's downright God-zilly
Our heroes forsaken forsworn.

And from the lighthouse top window
The man in his nightcap
"More anguish! More travail!
O! Another condo! Pre-fab, even! O! O! O!
Will it never end! And look! It's not plumb! O! O! O!"

And here, we trot out the local resident to say:
"Stay tuned!"

I'll second that!

God Bless the Mets for makin' a World Series of it!
El Duque has become El Puque(nice run tho', compadre!)
Roger C's still got a stick up his arse(so what else is new)...
Hell...even Rivera's given up a run!
Hail 7 Games!(in that town so nice they named it twice)
See U in Cooperstown!

(U.P. EYE) 2:40 pm October 25, 2000 Christchurch, New Zealand
Nevermind Nick, Jr, folks. He's trespassed upon my hard-drive and done a bad bad thing...
Courtesy of Banjo Paterson, here's my tribute to the noble egg-laying mammal we've all come to love down here like some kind of Southern Hemisphere speckled trout/muskrat something or other:

(U.P. EYE) October 25, 2000 2:25 pm Christchurch, New Zealand
G'Day Slothful Rich Snowboarders:
Forget coyote-skin butt warmers, platypus hides are all the international jet-set rage! That's right! Straight from Queensland and excitingly illegal! Take a furry gander at what's pictured below if a mere plastic porta-potty toilet seat has been inhibiting you from taking up extreme-skiing at Mt. Bohemia!
And you thought goose-down was a necessary luxury!
Available soon in small and extra-large at your local sporting goods stores!

Congressman sir:
Please check the KT site Chuck buck will steer you in the right direction. Also you all should read Mark Vichich editorial. It seems crosswinds is up to alot behind the scenes. And it is not all good. True, not about pro hill or anti hill. ZONING IS THE ISSUE. Not only for Bohemia but all of RS. Also today heard a company out of Traprock Valley will be manufacturing coyote skin toilet seats for the Porta potties. Seems a local yocal with some industrial insight has his sights set on those yuppie behinds. LOL

Dear Mr. Schmoe:
Thanks for satellite footage url. Do you know per chance precisely where the Poop Processor is to be planted?
Is it in the northwestern quadrant of Section 30?

SALE!! SALE!! SALE!!!

60% OFF SALE ON ELECTRIC SEAT WARMERS.
STATE OF THE ART PORTA-POTTY SEAT WARMERS TO KEEP YOUR MISSY POOHS BEHIND WARM WHILE DOING HER NATURAL DUTY. BEATS A COLD OUTHOUSE ANYDAY. COME ON FELLOW YUPPIES, GET YOURS NOW BEFORE THE RUSH TO BOHEMIA COMES, AND WE HAVE TO SHIVER OUR BEHINDS ON THAT COLD SEAT.

Zoom in on the area, to 2m or 1m, see all that water, streams, ponds, wetlands, hit the down arrow, you can see the one ski run from years ago, get and idea where it is at. WOW. Maybe the DEQ needs to do a flyover to get an idea of the big picture. Enjoy.

Interesting story on KT. Ms. Anderson did a swell job on the DEQ and Sewer Application. Being a map man I went to a site and found topographic and satellite imagery of the proposed site. Does the DEQ realize this section is only one half mile fromt the montreal river. Wetlands, ponds, streams that drain into the montreal. Yuck all that brown stuff in the river, into lake superior eventually. Check out the URL:http://www.terraserver.microsoft.com/image.asp?S=13&T=1&X=263&Y=3282&Z=16&W=2

The Environmental Charter is the work of a bunch of sick, communistic tree-huggers. These jerks want to tell private property owners what to do with their own land!

If Crosswinds has anything to do with this anti-American group, they can forget about any real skiers from coming to the hill. But I don't think Lonnie is that stupid. No--I know he's not.

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE CONTACT: Geraldine Hughes,
June 14, 2000 NSAA Director of Public Policy
(303) 987-1111, ext. 211
Stacy Gardner, NSAA
Director of Communications
(303) 987-1111, ext. 203

SKI INDUSTRY UNVEILS ENVIRONMENTAL CHARTER
Ski Areas, Environmental Groups, Government Agencies Collaborate to Craft Voluntary Environmental Principles to Protect the Alpine Environment

The National Ski Areas Association unveiled its Environmental Charter for Ski Areas at a press conference on June 14 in Washington D.C. at the National Press Club.

The Charter includes a set of voluntary principles for protection of the alpine areas in which resorts operate and formalizes the industry's commitment to environmental sustainability. It outlines “best practices” for ski areas to adopt and implement. Over one hundred and sixty ski areas, representing 70 percent of the country’s skier/snowboarding visits, have endorsed the Charter. The following areas are covered:

· Planning and Design – to engage surrounding communities and interest groups in a dialogue on development plans.

· Operations – to conserve natural resources in such areas as water, energy, waste management, fish and wildlife, forest and vegetative management, wetlands and riparian areas, air quality and visual quality.

· Education and Outreach – to use the natural surroundings as a means to increase environmental awareness and enhance the relationships between resorts and other stakeholders.

“As operators of an outdoor sport whose appeal depends largely on the beauty of its environment, our members have long thought of themselves as good environmental stewards,” said Michael Berry, president of NSAA. “But this initiative marks the first time we collectively have sought out the cooperation of many groups who should be our natural allies. The result is a document that demonstrates the sincerity and commitment of this industry.”

“The ski business would be tough to take on unless you harbor a deep love of natural surroundings,” said Jerry Blann, chair of NSAA’s environmental committee and president of Jackson Hole Resort in Wyoming. He pointed out the Charter’s Preamble, which notes, “A strong environmental ethic underlies our operations, makes us stewards of the natural surroundings, and is the basis for our commitment to constant improvement in environmental conditions.”

The Charter is a result of a year-long process that involved representatives of the nation’s major environmental groups, government agencies and ski area operators who provided input. The Keystone Center, a non-profit public policy and education organization headquartered in Colorado, facilitated meetings in four regions of the country to shape the Charter.

Twelve Partnering Organizations, entities that support the Charter and are committed to working with the industry in the future, include: the Colorado Department of Public Health & Environment; Conservation Law Foundation; U.S. Dept. of Energy; US Environment Protection Agency; USDA Forest Service; Leave No Trace; The Mountain Institute; National Fish and Wildlife Foundation; National Park Service Concession Program; 2002 Olympics Salt Lake City Organizing Committee; Teton County, Wyoming; and Trust for Public Land.

Mark Sinclair, senior attorney and vice president of the Conservation Law Foundation (CLF) said his organization is proud to endorse the Charter. “In New England, CLF has found that collaborative processes can be tremendously useful in solving ski development issues in creative ways. CLF believes that the new environmental Charter will allow ski resort owners and environmental groups to work more closely together to improve the sustainability of the ski industry.”

“We might not always agree on a course of action, but the industry believes that by continuing the dialogue we have started to develop this Charter, we will demonstrate our continuing commitment to these issues,” said Berry.

Participating ski areas will voluntarily follow the Charter’s Principles, in addition to complying with existing federal, state and local environmental laws. Ski areas that endorse the Charter will receive and display a “Sustainable Slopes” endorsement logo so the public can identify them. SKI magazine designed and printed thousands of copies of the 23-page Environmental Charter for ski areas, which will be distributed through ski areas and posted on NSAA’s website, www.nsaa.org.

NSAA will collect data from resorts on an annual basis to issue a report on the industry’s progress. Partnering organizations will provide input on the data collection. NSAA has committed to a continued dialogue with environmental organizations to further refine the Charter over time.

The National Ski Areas Association serves as the trade association for ski area owners and operators. The association began in 1962 and is located in Lakewood, Colorado.

I've recently received word that a local bank will be laying off many of its valuable employees soon. A reliable source rang me up on my shoe-phone and spoke on condition of anonymity.
One employee was asked about his work there at the bank. Afraid that her job would be in jeopardy if he was quoted under her real name, he informed my reliable source that over the years it was common for many to work OT hours without putting said time on time card. When asked why this was so, it was related that "they didn't want to cause a stir" and to boot, the bank frowned upon the employees racking up too much over-time. The bank, however, gladly and with both eyes closed (err, winking) [because the supervisors had for the most left on time at 5 P.M.] was completely ignorant that its workers were putting in time "to get the job done because certain things needed to be done daily."
Unknown at this time, is whether or not the untaken OT would have negatively affected the Christmas bonuses of the Biggy Bigs.
Another source close to the events has said that former workers, laid off in the past, along with the newly let go, will be organizing an organization to commemorate the laid-off with a small black wall, near the larger dark wall, and it will be here that no one will be anonymous, or unsung.
Till then, the names of the let go will not be released, as they are all
book-keepers.

(Fifty years from now, a photo will become available of these book-keepers. The photo will be hung on the wall of a local fast-food joint, next to a recently unearthed photo of smiling miners.)

"Night Falls on Our Happy Little Keweenaw"

We find our heroes lodged on the Lac La Belle dock
Roy G is busy pirouetting in his Rocky chest waders
and a gift from Ms Andry, an evironmental smock,
"I'll surely find work on the Walloping Window Blind!
They'll need a ballroom dancer, with me what a find!

As Ray Don picks at his guitar he begins to croon,
Roy stops dancing and our heroes sing Ray's tune

Ray's New Tune (A variation on Cat Scratch Fever)

We're foxy urban bunnies in day-glo spandex-x-x-x!
We're snots from the city-y-y-y!
While skiing down the mountain we found a surprise!
A shiny magic sunshine lantern
In day-glo bright brass-s-s-s-s-s!

We're snots from the city
And we found a little brass-s-s-s!
Foxy urban bunnies in pink spandex-x-x-x!
Snots from the city! Urban napalm!

Well we rubbed the little lantern and out popped some jobs,
Career opportunities for Bills Janes and Bobs!
We're all cosmopolitan we're Calvin & Hobbes!
A million dollar payroll! We're sure to be snobs!

Snots from the City!
We're Urban Napalm!

(A flock of geese leave their lodgings on the nearby water.
With Honky-Doodle, the red-nosed goose leading the way.)

Walt uses his time most constructively
Perusing a newspaper under an environmentally safe candle
He stays quite busy with, The Keweenaw Travesties
"It says here there's jobs most abundantly,
But Professor Incredibly Large Brains has another handle,
He claims what people really really want
What they really really want
Is a Job With Big Bucks,
Really really Big Bucks,
A Career Opportunity.

And Ray Don comes up with a new tune.
Ray's New Tune:

O! The big brained folk will save the world
Save the world, save the world,
O! The big brained will save the world,
Soon after they retie-y-y-y-ER!
Right after Wheel of Forrr-Chun!

Is she any closer, the Walloping Window Blind?
Roy G shades his eyes from the bright Northern Lights,
And gazes most intently
Out at Gitchie Gume-e-e-e-e

Yup, still wallowing about,
She's a zigging and a zagging
Through a convey of value-added ore boats
Full of entry-level sailors and a few old salts
She's quite maneuverable, wee wee, the Walloping Window Blind

Ray Don: The ship, she is slow.
All three:Oh no! 'Tis a fog coming in!

A local resident is trotted on stage to say
"Stay tuned!"
The Northern Lights are snuffed out
With a thick blanket of Fog.

Dear Black Bear:
I've stolen into Da-Da's document file and secured this add-on for LSLC's Mt. Bohemia 1991 Feasability Study.
Just think of me as his precocious cradle-rocking copy-editor(underground internet handle= "Ursa Miner")
ps: Before this clandestine dispatch, I just want to forward you the Funniest World Series Moment(and no, it wasn't Roger Clemens childhood flashback--hmmm, me throw stick at he who throw stick at me...nope, it was a pink cartoon balloon seen hovering in the Yankees dugout("Mets in 3000")
OK Ursa Major, here's pop's poop(scooped and re-looped--courtesy of K-Today Archives):


How's about toll-booths between the yurts and attached porta-potties? Then hire yourself a unionized bucket-brigade(er, Waste Management Team) to increase local employment(and minimum wage) while also padding the Calumet Sewer(or is Dingle-Berry Control Team?) budget with weekly transfers through an Upstream(hydroelectric)toll booth, thus cutting electrical costs, keeping Fed Inspectors forever at bay and perhaps even funding an MTU study to find out which(and how much) participants will pay to pee or poo(Skiiers vs snowboarders? Extreme vs casual? Men vs women? Young vs old? Dogs vs cats? Ohh, the permutations here could enumerate forever, perhaps even via the ka-ching of a one-armed bandit...).
Then, on top of all that, our lucky ski-hill athletes could be simultaneously earning brownie-point coupons for season-pass discounts by unconditionally contributing to Black Bear's master-plan of evolving a species of winter sport enthusiasts who, after several recombinant-enhanced generations of natural selection, become bladderless colonless self-contained recyclables with unique sphincter adaptations whose sudden, and at first frightening, appearance converts Southern Baptist Fundamentalists to Darwin, rescues whatever pristine environment remains from the brink of extinction, and provides the DNA mutation that allows bio-engineers to equip each of us with the ability to endure long space-flights in small space-shuttle catapulted capsules to Mars(where the mountains are really really tall and the beer is really really cold--for solar, much less global, warming has yet to arrive) thus beginning our long-delayed colonization of the Universe as a super-race of snow-job artists.
Ahhh, it's so elegant...why didn't I think of it before?
A SOLUTION FOR POLLUTION!
OUR BRAVE NEW FRONTIER!
Hey...it's fun being a peacemaker!

THANKS!
GOOD NIGHT EVER'BODY!
AND SURF SAFELY!

GOOD MORNING CAMPERS!

"Gitche Manito, the mighty,
Smoked the calumet, the Peace-Pipe,
As a signal to the nations.
And the smoke rose slowly, slowly,
Through the tranquil air of morning,
First a single line of darkness,
Then a denser, bluer vapor,
Then a snow-white cloud unfolding,
Like the tree-tops of the forest,
Ever rising, rising, rising,
Till it touched the top of heaven..."

HWL

Speaking of rising smoke, check out today's Pasty Cam